あなたがいた森

作詞：　渡辺愛未　
作曲:　出羽良彰　　　　編曲:　出羽良彰・渡辺善太郎
歌：　樹海

深い深い森の中　ほのか香る愛しい
日々の面影探してみれば　ふいにあなたが笑う

触れてみたくて　手を伸ばしても
儚く宙を舞ったのです

あなたに会いたくてずっと　会いたくてずっと想う
眠れぬ夜を渡り
あなたが残した　光と影の中に
包まれて泣いている

ダメなあたしを　焦がし沈む夕日と
裸足のまま愛の残骸を踏んで　滲んだ赤

触れてみようと　手をかざしたら
あなたの声がしたの

「愛して」　いまさら届かぬ　唄は風にさらわれ
はるか消えていったよ
砂時計空高く　飛ばしてみても何も　あの日の音は響かず

二度とは触れない景色たちが
さらさら流れ出して

「消せない」　増えすぎた空気　かさねすぎた記憶と
その手もその髪も
あなたが残した　光と影はあまりにも　大きすぎるのでした

深い深い森の中で。。。


English Translation:
The Forest You Were In
Performed by Jyukai

In the deep, deep forest, there's a lovely faint fragrance
Searching through the everyday faces, suddenly I see your smile

I want to try and touch you, and even as I reach out to you,
You flew into the empty sky

I've always wanted to see you, I've always missed you
Passing through sleepless nights, surrounded in the light and shadow you left behind,
I'm crying

The ruined me, burning in the setting sun,
As I tread barefoot on love's wreckage, staining it red

As I tried to touch you, raising my hands,
I hear your voice

"I love you." Even now after so long, my song is blown away by the wind,
disappearing far far away
Flying high in the sky of the hourglass, I see nothing
The voice of that day echoes

The sceneries which can't be touched twice,
Rustle as they flow away

"Inerasable." The air is intensifying, and the memories are over piling.
That hand, and also that hair
The light and shadow that you left behind was too great

In the deep, deep forest...

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Waah, I'm in love with a girl >.<
Yes, I'm in love with a girl who goes by the name Saber aka Arturia Pendragon aka King Arthur


This song is the 1st ending theme for the anime Fate/Stay Night, which is based on the popular Japanese Visual Novel which goes by the same name. Wanna know why I'm so in love with such a wonderful and skillful swordswomen, a naïve yet matured, cute yet deadly character? Well, you'll just have to tune into the show to find out for yourself then.

Saber lives forever.

Song transcription and translation by Yong-sama. © Yong-sama 2007

19

I can't believe that I've been able to live this long to see myself reach the age of 19. Although I know that I'm still young and should have a long way to go ahead of me, somehow after watching the Japanese drama '1 Litre of Tears', only did I really realize how little I've actually been doing for the past 19 years of my life. Compared to the girl Kitou Aya who at 19 was bravely fighting her disease, I feel so small.

Although it wasn't much of a celebration this time around due to my chickenpox, I had a small celebration at home just with my family, and no birthday celebration ever felt better. Thanks Mum for the Choc Cheese Cake that you specially bought me from Secret Recipe, thanks Dad for the take-away dinner of Nasi Briyani you knew I liked so much all the way from Shah Alam, and well, thanks little bro for not running away from me at least for one night.

Thanks to all my friends who sent me birthday wishes. Especially Sanjeve's call, in which was a total surprise to me, hope you had a wonderful birthday too. Thanks to Fern and Vivz, who actually took time to call me, knowing I would be no where but home.

Thanks also to all those who sent me birthday sms-es. Do you want me to list out your names here? Haha I'll do it anyway. Thank you Jia Ling, whose wonderfully timed sms reached me at 1 second past midnight. I salute you for being able to do that. Thank you Willy, Hui Ling, Charlotte, Sarah, Kui Tien, Kuey Ch'ng, Alina, Charmaine, Han King, Athirah, Ai Cheng, Ker Zhing, Bilqis, Putra for the birthday wishes. And also thank you Cheng Wei, Maine, and Foo for the not yet but almost belated birthday wishes. And thank you Sue-Anne for the long distance sms that came all the way from Australia.

(Yes, I mean no I'm not trying to shoot down all those who forgot my birthday. It's no big deal anyway, so no worries, I would most probably forget your birthdays too =D And yes , you must think I'm insane to remember everyone who wished me. But I was bored at home see, so...)

Being 19 is like being on a bridge, the end behind you would be your past, all your childhood years, teen years, which are finally coming to an end. And the ending of the bridge in front of you, are many more paths leading to life's future and whatever it may hold for you. As much as I loved the past 19 years of my life, I still don't really feel like crossing the bridge. But I know as I keep moving on, God will provide for me as he always has. And as Kitou Aya wrote in her diary, ずっと生きて (continue living). And that's exactly what I plan to do.

Well here goes to the last year of my teens. Cheers.
It's time to grow up, Wan Yong.

Down and Out

It sucks to be down with Chickenpox when you're almost 19 and studying full time in a real brain grinding and time constraining course. Trust me, I know what I'm saying.

"Wah, shiok ar... Sit home for a full 2 weeks without having to attend classes or do anything important. So nice."

Yea right. If anyone dares to say this to me... I swear I'll stuff my medicine bottle down your throat once I'm fully recovered. Don't worry, you would have about like 2 weeks to pack your belongings and run far, far away before I come looking for you. *Grins evilly*

Yes, I might have 2 full weeks to stay home and well, do nothing because I don't have to do anything, but can you imagine how much I'm missing out in life because of this stupid viral infection? Plans going awry for the next 2 weeks, missing out on important classes, being isolated from friends, and even having my own little brother avoiding me like I have the plague or something. (He hasn't got it F.Y.I. Oooh... but the more you try to run, the more likely you're gonna get it... Muahahahah... you can run but you can't hide, oh-adorable-little-bro of mine)

Okay-lah... I know I'm being over-sarcastic or whatever it is. It's just that I feel super annoyed. It's bad enough to get infected with this disease, so fine, I accept it and am glad it got me now rather than later in life. But what I cannot seem to accept is... well...

I think I better not write down what I feel, I don't want to hurt people's feelings. But just a piece of advice, next time, before you ask a sick person, "How are you feeling? Better?" Stop and think twice, how would the person feel if everyone around him/her asks the same old question day-in day-out?

I know all of you are really wishing me well and I thank you all for your thoughts and concerns, it's not like it's bad or anything. But next time you address me, just drop off the "How are you feeling?" part, okay? It's nice not to be treated as a sick person when one is actually sick you know.

=D


PS. Make sure your future kid gets the pox before he/she is old enough to remember anything. You would't want them to suffer now would you?








I would like to say sorry if I've hurt anyone's feelings. You can hate me all you want. Go on, insult me in anyway you like. But I can't help what I feel, and what I'm feeling now is annoyance and irritated. Maybe it's because of the drugs I'm taking, so yea you can blame me and the drugs as well. Oh, and thanks to all whose messages have in some ways brightened my day. Thanks for thinking about me ^_^. I wanna get well soon too alright?

Hair

Hair, is a filamentous outgrowth of protein. To simplify it, it's those long/short thingys growing on your head or anywhere else you may or may not like it (depending on your gender and age of course).

The hair on your head would be one of the few things that kinda determines your image whether it be feisty, boring, modest, or just plain bald. However, the hair on your body, be it on your legs, chest or wherever it is supposed to be, is just there because I, Yong-sama, has no explanation for it. So there. There.

Anyway for those of you who still doesn't know what I'm trying to get at and hasn't seen me in the past few days, well I have news for you then:

Yong-sama has bitten (or rather, had it chopped, okay fine, it's trimmed) off what once used to be her utmost pride of all atop her crown, her hair of course. Oh, oh, and she got it coloured too, despite her notorious stand against the use of hair dyes, she seems to have gone against her own policies.

Hey but seriously, if someone were to offer you a free haircut plus colour done by professionals and also a bonus of RM 100 in payment, wouldn't you actually say yes to the offer, regardless of how beautiful and pure you think your hair may be? Well I definitely would (blah I need the money $__$). And there you have my answer to the question :"OMG Wan Yong?! What did you do to your hair!?"

People have been constantly asking me questions on how could I possibly be willing to cut off my long tresses, and boy am I getting sick answering questions like these. Like hello? My hair will grow back okay? It's not like I'm shaved it all off and became bald or anything... it's just well, short! Haha, guess that's because most of you are so used to seeing me with long black hair that having me in front of your eyes with coloured short hair is just, shocking.

Truth be told, I certainly was a little heartbroken to lose my long hair just like that in the short 4 hours that I was sitting in the red chair in the studio. But I had been fully prepared to lose it, ever since the day I made up my mind to volunteer as a 'hair model' and receive the payment as a sacrifice. What I haven't been prepared for however, were the reactions that I would sooner or later receive from my friends. A few examples of reactions received were:

"Eh, who's that there? Oh man, is that WAN YONG?!"

"OMG, who are you wei?" complete with bulging eyes and dropped jaw.

"What did you do to your hair? Noooooooo, why did you cut it?!"

"Eh! You cut your hair! (like duh =.=) Eh, colour summore! Eh nice!"

"Wan Yong!!! I like your new hairstyle!!! Look like Japanese/Korean!"

"Wah crap, look so lala..."

So well then, what used to be hair like this... (Haha, pardon me for camwhoring, but I quite like this picture)

Has turned into a whole new style... like this:

Tada!

All congratulations and condolences can be directed to me via e-mail, commenting, chatterbox in blog or sms. Feel free to shoot as you would like. Oh, and F.Y.I, I quite like my new hairstyle a lot, thank you very much.

Harry Potter

*WARNING - This post may contain unintended spoilers. Do not read on if you think that you may not be able to take on any disappointments.*

At last, the Harry Potter saga has come to an end for me.

(I know it's kinda late for me to actually say this, but I have to admit that it took me quite a long time to actually get my hands on an authentic copy of the book.)

Yet, finishing the last book didn't quite give me the excitement I was once overcome with when I first started on this series. As I progressed on from one book to the next, that exhilarating feeling and a certain rush of adrenalin that I used to experience while reading the earlier books of Harry Potter seemed to disappear and fade away. It began with the 5th book I think, (Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix) where the magical charm of Harry Potter seemed to loosen its grip on me.

My teenage years were somewhat spent growing up with Harry, like how I grew up with Enid Blyton's books during my childhood. Somehow I realised as I grew older, the Potter series did not seem as appealing to me as it once did, and who, I'm thinking, should I actually put the blame on, if any at all?

Would I say it's because of J.K. Rowling then, whom I think did in fact suffer a drop in excellence after writing the 4th book. But somehow this seems to be happening to all other writers I know whose stories seem to stretch longer than 4 books. Should it be called the Fatal Fifth Curse then?

Or maybe it's just me. I guess it can be said that I've grown up considerably since I first put my little nose into the 1st book (I was but 13 years old back then). Taking a full 6 years to finish just a 7 book series is the first and longest time I've ever done, and which I also think would be the last too.

I was hoping to be able to finish the final book with huge burst of contempt and satisfaction, but I guess J.K. Rowling just couldn't live up to my expectations any more, it is after all, a children's book. When I closed the book at 11pm last night, what I felt inside me was instead, a 'Okay. The end. That's it' feeling. I'm willing to confess that I did, in fact, feel a small tinge of regret for not enjoying the book more, but I know no matter how much I try again and again to enjoy the book by re-reading it, I would never find that spark of pleasure I once enjoyed from reading the earlier books.

But it wouldn't be fair for me to put it this way either, would it? Harry has, after all, grown up, and as Rowling should be given due credit, I guess that the whole story had somewhat matured alongside Harry as well.

Lastly, I'd like to say that I do think the Harry Potter series is a classic and will always be one of the best written ones. Although it does come with its flaws and disappointments, Harry did not in fact, let us down in the end. And as Rowling and Potter would put it, "All is well."






I'd like to apologise to any true Potter/Rowling fans if I've offended them in any way. It is, after all, my freedom to give my opinion on the book. But I'd also like all of you to know, that I love Harry Potter, and he will always live on in my heart, taking his rightful place as my favourite children's storybook hero. I'm now contempt to live out my remaining teenage years in peace, sparing the remaining Potter films from my insults, knowing that finally, all is well.

Things You May Have Not Known About ME before...

It's the month of August! It's the month you get to know more about Yong-sama!

Aiyah, I just picked it up from Sue-Anne's and Qi Hong's blog after rummaging through their old posts. I do realise that he tagged me like who knows how long ago but I didn't bother to do anything as I was busy (or I might have been). Ah well, something extra to add to my August posts so people have no right to say I haven't been blogging then =p


5 Weird things about myself:
No 1 - Remember the KFC bun you always get when you order their set meals. Well yeah, what I like to do is bite off the top of the bun, put in coleslaw, cover it over with mash potatoes, and add a small red dot of chili on the top. And I'll only consume it after eating my first piece of chicken.

No 2 - I love and love to wear lacy, pretty, colourful undergarments. I mean come on, who doesn't? Don't you like to look good both inside and outside? Aww man... Is it just me or what?

No 3 - I have this weird 'thing' of getting influenced easily by the person sitting next to me in class. No, not in style or fashion or habits or anything, it's their handwriting. If I sit next to the same person for too long, my handwriting will start changing to look like the handwriting of the person beside me.

No 4 - I need at least 9 hours of sleep a day to be totally awake and focused for the following day, else I get all cranky and will start to space out by 3 in the afternoon.

No 5 - The secret is out: I still have my bolster I was using since I was 3 years old, and am still using it up until now. Go on, you can laugh at me, I don't care =.=

Layer 1: On the outside
Name: If you're reading my blog, you'd most probably know my name. But anyway, what people call me ranges from Wan Yong to Yong to Yong-yong to 'Wan U' to Yong-sama to Yong-chan and Yong-san and the occasional OI or EH.

Birth Date: The 27th day of the 8th month of 19XX

Current Status: What status lah? Be specific! Mental status - Insane, Physical status - Somewhat there but not fit enough, Dating status? - Single but extremely unavailable. No I'm not weird or anything FYI. Studies first studies first!

Eye Colour: Hazel brown.

Hair Colour: Was golden brownish about 10 years back, and then it was brown... and now? It's almost close to black. (Nuuuu my beautiful golden brown hair......)

Righty of Lefty: Righty and will always be. I can't even write my name with my left hand (stupid, useless piece of &$@!)


Layer 2: On the INSIDE?
My Heritage: Ima Chinese! HockChiew and Hakka (I can't speak either) (although I've had people saying that I'm a Japanese/Korean)

My Fears: I hate centipedes and millipedes and also flying cockroaches, I'm afraid I'll die in a really horrific way like having my head run over by a bus or a lorry, and I dread the day the doctors declare me a diabetic and ban me from all my sweet sweet stuff

My Perfect Pizza: Er... Spaghetti with meatballs, Carbonara, Extreme Supreme Hawaiian Chicken and Super Extra Seafood all on each quarter of a Box-shaped pizza with filling in it =D (I know it sounds nuts)


Layer 3: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow...
My Thoughts First Waking Up: "Whuuuut? Whut time isit? Whut day isit? Oh crap am I late for class? FISHES!!!" *scrambles out of bed and nearly falls*

My Bedtime: Between 11pm - 2am, and 3pm - 5pm, as long as I get a minimum of 9 hours sleep

My Most Missed Memories: My time spent with friends yam-cha-ing and BS-ing, family during holidays, foster family in Japan, sensei and tomodachi in classes, dreams in my sleep (o.O)...


Layer 4: My Pick?
Pepsi or Coke: It doesn't matter, they taste the same. (To those who disagree, sorry-lah okay, my tongue cacat la sheesh) But if you have to know, it's Coke... Pepsi is just so... 'Pepsi'

McDonald's or Burger King: McD's for the price and fries and sundaes and cute plush toys. Sorry la Burger King... if you had the guts and $$$ to pop up everywhere just like McD's then maybe I'd have said "Burger King"...=p

Single or Group Dates: I'd prefer single I guess, it'd be so weird having group dates... Make me think of orgy only LOL

Adidas or Nike: Nike wins in the design category, although they suck at the quality category. But I still like Nike T_T

Tea or Nestea: Har? Nestea also has tea in it, no? Yer... Nestea over tea but green tea over Nestea anytime

Cappuccino or Coffee: Same right? Caffeine in both?!?! Ipoh white coffee owns all lah


Layer 5: Do You...
Smoke: Never in my life. Not even if anyone threatens to commit suicide =.=

Curse: Of course. It's not that I love to do it or anything. My favourite word for now is FISHES btw... (as in I love to eat fish punya fish okay) =D

Take a Shower: Who doesn't? o.O Oh wait, some people only take BATHS... Do you realise how much water you're wasting taking BATHS!? *blahblahblahblah...waste of water...blahblah pollution...blahblahblah...think of future generations...blahblah...end of the world...blahblah*

Have a Crush: No. Noooo. NO. (Must... Concentrate... On... Studies...)

Think You've Been in Love: Nah, never. I'm only 19. Oh oops... age terbocor adi...

Go to School: Went to school. Goes to college.

Want to Get Married: Duh

Believe in Yourself: Definitely. I trust you, Yong. I LOVE ME! XD

Think You are a Health Freak: Not really, but I wouldn't like to die of multiple health problems either


Layer 6: In the Past...
Drank Alcohol: Yes, even before I was legally permitted to. I wasn't your perfect angel and good girl most people think I am.

Gone to the Mall: Eh hello?! I live in the city okay? I'm not some ulu person okay?

Been on a Stage: Countless of times. I still get 'pre-stage' butterflies though

Eaten Sushi: Yep, both lousy sushi in Malaysia and super expensive but delicious sushi in Japan. Aiya, this question should ask 'Eaten worms/bugs' or something mar... Sushi's so common

Dyed Your Hair: Nope. Dyeing your hair ruins it! "Say NO to hair dyes! NO to hair dyes!"


Layer 7: Have You Ever...
Played a Stripping Game: Nope, not physically? Lol... if just main main in chat room then... (but I didn't finish the game though!!!)

Changed Who You Were to Fit In: Not once. Although there were times in the past that I wished I was different, I never actually thought of carrying out the action. As of now, I'm happy and satisfied with who I am (and I hope it'll be the same in the future too)


Layer 8: Age You're Hoping...
To Be Married: Latest by 29, earliest 26 (But if I'm still a spinster by 35... I think I'd need somebody's help... lol)

To Die: It'd be nice if I would be able to see 88 birthday candles on my cake. But as long as I think that I've enjoyed life as I wanted to, I'd peacefully go


Layer 9: In a Girl...(Eh shouldn't this be Boy for me? LOL)
Best Eye Colour: Turquoise or green is my dream-guy's eye colour =D But since there wouldn't be much variety in Asians, dark brown would be fine (Oh, and no contact lenses... original only)
Best Hair Colour: Something dark, black or dark brown would be cool

Short Hair or Long Hair: In between, a little on the long side. (Actually short also can be quite hot...depends on the person. Look at Wentworth Miller lah -Michael Scofield from Prison Break- crew cut on him is sooo hot! XD)


Layer 10: What Were You Doing...
A Minute Ago: Obviously filling up the blanks in this post. But if you were to say exactly, I would've been typing "Obviously filling up the blanks in this post.", before I paused to think what to write next.

An Hour Ago: Sitting in Viv's Myvi, on the way back from KL

4.5 Hours Ago: Hanging at Viv's house, having lunch while chatting with Ai Cheng

A Month Ago: Precisely one month ago, I would've been attending Taxation classes at college

A Year Ago: One year? Hmm... Eh I don't know lah... how can one possibly remember? It should've been a Sunday... Ah! Got it! I was taking my usual Sunday afternoon nap (which I no longer am able to enjoy anymore T_T )


Layer 11: Finishing the Sentences...
I love: My Daddy, Mummy and lil bro and other family members, all my friends, God my Father, books, Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp, okonomiyaki, green tea, anime, my electone and the precious expensive songbooks from Japan, my electronic dictionary, birthdays, sports and baking, money, chocolates and anything sweet, and last of all, Mr.Patrick Star

I hate: Centipedes and millipedes, flying cockroaches, the college cafeteria closing on Sundays, smokers who don't give a damn about all the 2nd hand smokers around them, and the Malaysian attitude of drivers who always slow down to 'pat' at any stalled cars/accidents on the road.

I hide: Certain secrets from my parents and sometimes even friends, chocolates I bought with my own cash from my brother, feelings that I don't want to show (wah so emo)

I miss: My host family all the way in Japan, all the great times I spent with my beloved friends and family, going to secondary school, being able to take naps on Sunday afternoons...

Yep, that's all. You don't have to read this if you don't want to you know. Next is...
Wan Yong's birthday list!!! I want......

Just kidding. Figure out what I want yourself =p. Even if I do tell, I think most of you won't be able to afford it anyway =p. Happy hunting!

Happy August!

It's August! And August is International Friendship Month!

Well, at least I think it is...

So anyway, I'd like to take this opportunity to say thank you and Happy Friendship Month to all those who have called themselves my friends in the almost 19 years that I have lived~

Thank you all for the fun, joy, laughter, anger, sorrow.
Thank you all for always being there.
Thank you all for being who you are.
And thank you all for choosing me as a friend.

Happy Friendship Month!
Yong-sama loves you all.

Special thanks and credits to anyone who has contributed in all ways small or big to my life, and also anyone whose beautiful works lie in pictures used in this post.